Journal of a Left-Wing Radical: There came a blessed day in my life in which I thought I would never face fear again. Oh, I’m not talking about the temporary scare of a spring storm, a near automobile accident, or being lowered from a ship in a small boat into six-foot seas.
I’m talking about that gnawing, primal fear that forms when
you have no control over your life and you are well aware that there are forces
all about you that wish you dead. It’s that “any minute, any second” fear that
some know more about than others and which most have never known. It is at its
rawest and most fearful on a dark night between midnight and dawn.
Extended fear can seep deeply into places you desperately
want to be sacred and untouched. It changes a person, sometimes for the better,
sometimes for the worse.
I was right for over 50 years. There were storms and there
were moments of deep concern, any number of temporary fears. There was even fear
that she would say, “No.”
But there wasn’t the raw kind that steals your soul and
makes you shrink from strange faces.
Until now.
No comments:
Post a Comment